I won't lie. Focusing at work is tough! I told S I'd be over at 6 and can't hang at work. I leave at 4 and go to Barre class.
Snapshot of my athletic history: Between 2003 and 2007, I did 9 marathons, a Half – Ironman and at least 40 other races to prepare. From 2009 to 2012, I worked for Reebok (specifically on CrossFit) and am educated in most modalities and have thrown down with the best of them. Fitness is part of my life and I work out almost every day and still teach at Equinox and the YMCA.
However, Barre Class kicks my ass every time! I love that it forces me to stay present (or risk falling over) and it makes me feel "girly." It's the perfect distraction.
After a quick shower, I head to S's house. His brother is coming down at 8 so we have a few hours to talk.
I have no expectations.
We chitchat and then he spills his truth. This is what I hear.
"I needed time to think about this and to talk to some friends. I am sorry that I left you hanging. I didn't know what else to do. I am scared, the timing sucks and I am all in for whatever you need. My friends think you sound great--you are great--and that I will be a good father. "
"I want to keep dating you and getting to know you. I can't have it be intimate now because that can't be all that we do."
Wow. He is thoughtful, smart and well-spoken. He is honest and authentic. It is clear his words are unplanned and from the heart.
Ding-dong. His brother arrives. We order pizza. They crack a few beers. His neighbors come over. It's fun! By 10, I am beat. He walks me to my car and I leave him to enjoy the night and celebrate the weekend with his brother.